A diary of our family's house building project in the Blue Mountains, NSW, Australia. Also my ponderings on family life, living with Asperger's Syndrome, running an ebay business & a place to share my photography.

Friday, 3 July 2009

Another diagnosis

Yesterday Brody was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. No surpriseat all, it was actually a relief, in a way. Hopefully he will now get some help at school & some more understanding from people in his life.
He had a major meltdown this morning, his first big one for quite a while. It was as if he had been given permission.
For me, it is a diagnosis that fills me with mixed emotion. Hope for his future, now that he will be eligle for various programmes. Relief, as I said, that we have a confirmation of what we already knew but other's wouldn't acknowledge. Sadness that it hadn't been recognised a long time ago, even when he was 6 or 7, as it was so obvious if you know anything about Aspergers.
How different his childhood could have been if he had been understood.
And anger at a society that expects everyone to be "normal", to behave the same as each other & to blame & shame those that aren't. This diagnosis is now is "excuse" to not have to be like everyone else & to still demand some respect for who he is, not only in his small circles but in mainstream society. I hope.
I love him so much & I'm so, so proud of him.

1 comment:

larissa said...

Hi Toni,
please forgive the scientist in me, but you are in a unique situation - you have two boys by different dads, who both have Asperger's. This to me, is evidence of an X linked genetic mutation - your two girls without the disorder add huge weight to this. Is there any history in your family? Most likely undiagnosed, but look at all the men in your mother's family - any traits? There are most likely geneticists who would give their eye teeth to explore the genetics of your family, especially since so little is understood about Asperger's.
I remember Brody as an intelligent, charismatic, talented young man. "Normal" as far as I'm concerned, is a cycle on a washing machine. Genetics and diagnosis aside, we are all unique.
Love to you all and very belated Happy Birthday to Kim.

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